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Lorelei Lee is a beautiful showgirl engaged to be married to the wealthy Gus Esmond, much to the disapproval of Gus' rich father, Esmond Sr., who thinks that Lorelei is just after his money. When Lorelei goes on a cruise accompanied only by her best friend, Dorothy Shaw, Esmond Sr. hires Ernie Malone, a private detective, to follow her and report any questionable behavior that would disqualify her from the marriage.

Dashing legionnaire Rick O'Connell stumbles upon the hidden ruins of Hamunaptra while in the midst of a battle to claim the area in 1920s Egypt. It has been over three thousand years since former High Priest Imhotep suffered a fate worse than death as a punishment for a forbidden love—along with a curse that guarantees eternal doom upon the world if he is ever awoken.

Margo is an ex-stripper who meets her long, lost father in Mexico. She looks after him in the waning days of his life, with the help of a traveling projectionist. The father passes away, telling of the loot from a botched bank robbery that he buried years earlier. The two get jobs in town as their relationship grows and they search for the treasure on the weekends. But while the treasure seems to bring them together, it also seems to be tearing them apart.

Sought by police and criminals, a small-time huckster makes a deal with a TV newsman for protection.

Keong comes from Hong Kong to visit New York for his uncle's wedding. His uncle runs a market in the Bronx and Keong offers to help out while Uncle is on his honeymoon. During his stay in the Bronx, Keong befriends a neighbor kid and beats up some neighborhood thugs who cause problems at the market. One of those petty thugs in the local gang stumbles into a criminal situation way over his head.

A British agent's son is kidnapped and held for a ransom of diamonds. The agent finds out that he can't even count on the people he thought were on his side to help him, so he decides to track down the kidnappers himself.

A man who has failed as a father and husband commits a heist to make money for his fledging business, but things become complicated when his wife interferes.

The title says it all. There's a mix up involving stolen diamonds which Ernest has (naturally) made into a yo-yo and given to his would be girlfriend, Rene. But Rene wants a man of action, and doesn't think that Ernest fits the bill. After the bad guys come looking for the stolen diamonds and kidnap Rene, all of her fantasies come true as Ernest has to go to Africa to rescue her.

A simple diamond heist leads Lupin into the machinations of a bizarre cult based around the prophecies of Nostradamus. They kidnap Julia, the daughter of Douglas, a wealthy American who is seeking the presidency, along with Lupin's diamond. At stake is the lost book of prophecy Douglas holds in the vault at the top of his skyscraper.

A CIA agent is sent to get Professor Braun before the KGB can seize him as the Prof's knowledge, together with a recently stolen diamond, could be used to make a laser cannon.

After a wealthy philanthropist expresses an unusual interest in a ring found by her niece Annabelle, Miss Fritton explains that she's descended from a pirate who, in 1598, stole treasure from another: the philanthropist's ancestor. This discovery sends the racuous girls of St. Trinians on the hunt for buried treasure.