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Perfect Match - (Feb 3rd)
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How bizarre is it that the only _Leprechaun_ movie that has any sort of continuity to the original, is also the only one that doesn't have the same actor playing the titular leprechaun. This one's actually not too bad though. The new guy does a pretty good job in those tiny little shoes. _Final rating:★★½ - Had a lot that appealed to me, didn’t quite work as a whole._
Since I’m on sick leave recovering from surgery I had last week and pretty immobile not to mention bored as hell I’ve of course been using up a fair amount of streaming bandwidth. The more bored, the poorer my choices have been so last evening, I am sad to say, I turned on the brain dead gore feast that goes under the name Leprechaun Returns. This is a SyFy “exclusive” so of course my hopes were pretty low from the start but what the hell, I felt like watching a gore feast so… Well, to sum it up, it was pretty bad. Worse however, the movie felt like a really missed opportunity. There were some bits that was actually cool or at least somewhat funny but the movie as a hole was ruined by really shitty script writing and pretty mediocre acting. The story could of course be written in a few paragraphs. It’s paper thin but I guess, for this kind of movie, it is adequate. There are the usual characters of course, the sexy chick, the dumbass alcoholic chick, some suitably unintelligent guys that doesn’t think about anything than sex and so on. In this movie they added a naïve eco-fanatic that cannot act and just grates on you. The heroin is probably the only character that is moderately normal. Then there’s the Leprechaun of course. He is pretty much the only thing that makes the movie worthwhile to watch. He was actually quite cool. A perfect character for a horror/comedy. Unfortunately everything else was mostly rubbish. The constant harping by the eco-lunatic about having to work, the constant boozing by the dumbass chick. And how many times did the sexy chick say that she wouldn’t sleep with the dumbest of the guys and then did it anyway? I lost count. Of course we also had the usual moments of stupidity that only a really shitty Hollywood script writer can produce. For instance the guy that was just standing there staring at the drone coming closer and closer for minutes. A drone capable of cutting through not just the throat but the entire f… neck with its propellers of someone just added to the stupidity of course. At least there were some moments which was satisfying. Like when the dumbass chick that thought she made a deal in her alcohol haze learned “not lay a hand on you” is not the same thing as “not kill you”. Then as I wrote, a lot of the scenes with the Leprechaun was rather funny. So it is a bit sad actually. With a half decent story/script writer this could have been a quite decent, maybe even good, comedy/horror movie. Now it will just be relegated the the growing heap of SyFy junk movies.
I guess the jokes didn't land so... It doesn't really feel like part of the franchise when it doesn't have that mix of absurd humor and horror. It felt almost cute and not ridiculous and I left it feeling robbed
After a horrifying PredAlien crash-lands near a small Colorado town, killing everyone it encounters and producing countless Alien offspring, a lone Predator arrives to "clean up" the infestation.
As a deadly virus ravages the world, Dr. Martin Lowery embarks on a mission to reach test site ATU327A, a research hub deep in the Arboreal Forest. The arduous journey, guided by park scout Alma, is set back by a nighttime attack that leaves the two bruised and shoeless. When they run into Zach, a man living off the grid, they gratefully accept his help. Zach’s intentions aren’t exactly what they seem, however, and a path out of the forest and into safety quickly fades as the line between myth and science blurs.
After Port Royal is attacked and pillaged by a mysterious pirate crew, capturing the governor's daughter Elizabeth Swann in the process, William Turner asks free-willing pirate Jack Sparrow to help him locate the crew's ship—The Black Pearl—so that he can rescue the woman he loves.
A fleet of Martian spacecraft surrounds the world's major cities and all of humanity waits to see if the extraterrestrial visitors have, as they claim, "come in peace." U.S. President James Dale receives assurance from science professor Donald Kessler that the Martians' mission is a friendly one. But when a peaceful exchange ends in the total annihilation of the U.S. Congress, military men call for a full-scale nuclear retaliation.
Axel Foley returns to the land of sunshine and palm trees to investigate the near-fatal shooting of police Captain Andrew Bogomil. With the help of Sgt. Taggart and Det. Rosewood, they soon uncover that the shooting is associated with a series of "alphabet" robberies masterminded by a heartless weapons kingpin—and the chase is on.
Frodo Baggins and the other members of the Fellowship continue on their sacred quest to destroy the One Ring-but on separate paths. Their destinies lie at two towers-Orthanc Tower in Isengard, where the corrupt wizard Saruman awaits, and Sauron's fortress at Barad-dur, deep within the dark lands of Mordor. Frodo and Sam are trekking to Mordor to destroy the One Ring of Power while Gimli, Legolas and Aragorn search for the orc-captured Merry and Pippin. All along, nefarious wizard Saruman awaits the Fellowship members at the Orthanc Tower in Isengard.
As armies mass for a final battle that will decide the fate of the world-and powerful, ancient forces of Light and Dark compete to determine the outcome-one member of the Fellowship of the Ring is revealed as the noble heir to the throne of the Kings of Men. Yet, the sole hope for triumph over evil lies with a brave hobbit, Frodo, who, accompanied by his loyal friend Sam and the hideous, wretched Gollum, ventures deep into the very dark heart of Mordor on his seemingly impossible quest to destroy the Ring of Power.
British estate agent Renfield travels to Transylvania to meet the mysterious Count Dracula, who is interested in leasing a castle in London. After Dracula enslaves Renfield and drives him to insanity, the pair sail to London together and Dracula, a secret vampire, begins preying on London socialites.
Instead of flying to Florida with his folks, Kevin ends up alone in New York, where he gets a hotel room with his dad's credit card—despite problems from a clerk and meddling bellboy. But when Kevin runs into his old nemeses, the Wet Bandits, he's determined to foil their plans to rob a toy store on Christmas Eve.
After their first adventure with the Hot Tub Time Machine, Lou and Nick are living very well off their ill-gotten gains, while Jacob still cannot rely on Lou to be a positive role model. When an unknown assailant breaks into Lou's mansion and shoots him, Nick and Jacob take him for another trip in the hot tub. They emerge in the year 2025, where they must figure out who shot Lou and prevent it from happening again.
Shrek, Fiona, and Donkey set off to Far, Far Away to meet Fiona's mother and father, the Queen and King. But not everyone is happily ever after. Shrek and the King find it difficult to get along, and there's tension in the marriage. The Fairy Godmother discovers that Fiona has married Shrek instead of her son Prince Charming and plots to destroy their marriage.